So, this post has been sitting in my drafts folder for a couple of years. Considering that my kids are now 9 & 11 you can tell how old it is. Anyway, I never finished it. I remember at the time I wrote this that I felt it was too negative, that I was just being a "Debbie Downer." But, now that my kids are older and I look back, I hope this blog gives hope to parents of younger kids. I promise, it does get better... at least it has for me. I wish I had finished what God was telling me at the time. But since I didn't... how about a little audience participation? What has God taught you in moments like these? What are the lessons you've learned from raising your kids? I would love to hear your feedback in the comments below.
......
Have you ever felt like you were drowning? I don't mean drowning in water, but drowning in the overwhelming presence of the people around you. I think that must be what agoraphobics feel like when they get in big crowds of people. They feel trapped, like there is no way out. All they want to do is run, run far away where they can breathe.
That is how I feel around my kids sometimes. I'm not saying this to complain. I'm just saying, sometimes I feel so trapped by them. I know I'm not the only one. I'm sure every Mom (and Dad) at some point has felt this.
Nothing is ever enough. In the eyes of my 5 and 7 year old I can never spend enough time with them. From the second they awake to the second they fall asleep it's, "Mom, I need..., Mom can you..., Mom I want... Mom! Mom! Mom!" It's not just me that feels this sometimes, it's my husband too. We have a joke in our house that Jaedon starts his questions as soon as Keith turns the doorknob. He doesn't even wait for Keith to get inside after a long day of work before he starts asking, "Dad can you..."
I can take them swimming at the YMCA and as soon as I say, "It's time to go guys," they are already asking, "Can we go to McDonald's?" In my mind I'm thinking, "We're not even out of the pool yet! Give me a second to think." Or we'll get home from an hour at the grocery store and as soon as I walk in the house, before I've put any groceries away they're asking, "Can you play a game with us?"
Sometimes when I'm really trying to focus on spending time with them is when I get the most exhausted. It's because as soon as I finish one board game they're already bringing out another. Or we'll spend an hour at the park and as soon as we get home they want to go on a bike ride. After the bike ride they want to go exploring in the back yard.
This has been driving me nuts lately. I'm thinking there are two truths (if you want to call them that) that God is trying to teach me through my kids.
1)
2)
Wednesday, November 5, 2014
Tuesday, November 4, 2014
Final Thoughts on Romania
I regret not blogging while we were actually in Romania. Partly because this would be done by now, but more so because it would be easier to express my feelings in the moment. So much happened and I don't want to bore everyone with just details. I've been thinking for several weeks that I need to wrap up my Thoughts on Romania posts, but its been really hard to get back to it. So much has happened since then and so much has changed.
So, I think I'll just give a simple recap of the final weeks and call it good.
Our last 2 1/2 weeks in Romania were spent traveling between our home base and the village of the future ranch. The dream is to have a horse ranch where the girls can go through equine therapy to promote their healing. The plan is to have it be self-sustaining with animals and crops. The land is there, the veterinarian is in place, the love and dream is there. Like so many things in this world, now it comes down to money. It's kind of hard to build a house and purchase animals and tools without money. God is starting to move and it is so awesome to see it happen.
Our first week at the ranch property we did some preliminary demolition and got started on some of the construction work that needed done. It was our family, our friend Randy, Scott, E., and Gabi and his dad. We got quite a bit done. E and I worked on tearing out an old brick oven. That was difficult work. But it felt so good to get my hands dirty and get some physical labor in. Unlike the week in Iabalcea where I kind of felt in the way, at the ranch I felt like I made a difference.
The 2nd week a large group from St. Louis came to join in our work. I think the single most detrimental stumbling block for a mission trip is poor communication. Without going into detail (because it doesn't really matter), we knew nothing about the St. Louis team that was coming out. All we knew was that it was huge (40+ people). They turned out to be such a huge blessing! They were able to work with several missionaries that are friends with Scott & Carolyn and so were a blessing on many fronts.
One of the biggest blessings that came out of it for Scott & Carolyn was that a couple of the people on the St. Louis team were able to come out to the ranch and film an interview with Scott, Carolyn & E. about Rock of Hope Ministries and the vision for the Ranch. They are then taking the film back to the States to help raise awareness and support for the ranch. That is HUGE! It was confirmation to us as well as Scott & Carolyn that God has this. It has been a long process, but God is putting things in place to make it happen. Without God, none of the dream for the ranch would be possible.
Keith and I also made some friends that are eager to return to Romania. That is also a blessing. The more people we can introduce to the Pouncey's and help them to catch their vision, the more the vision can spread and gain support.
I have a lot I could talk about, but so much of it involves the girls that live with the Pouncey's. I don't feel right sharing any of their stories because, as I've said before, they are not my stories to tell. However, I can say this. I feel connected to these girls. We are thousands of miles apart, but I still think and pray for them often. I still keep in touch with them. Though, lately, life seems to have become time consuming so I have not been able to talk to them for a while. I hope to remedy that this week.
So, the big question, for us at least, is do we want to go back. The answer is yes. I don't know how soon we will be able to simply because it is not cheap to fly a whole family to Europe for a month. However, it is totally worth every dime. The girls have become part of our family and we want to keep up those relationships as best we can. We still have friends from our first trip we would like to see again. And of course, we want to visit Scott, Carolyn, Gabi and Samina as well. I wish I could clone myself so I could just live in both countries at once. But, since that's never going to happen, I guess I just have to get better about finding time to Skype with the girls and save my pennies so someday soon we can return to our Romanian family.
So, I think I'll just give a simple recap of the final weeks and call it good.
Our last 2 1/2 weeks in Romania were spent traveling between our home base and the village of the future ranch. The dream is to have a horse ranch where the girls can go through equine therapy to promote their healing. The plan is to have it be self-sustaining with animals and crops. The land is there, the veterinarian is in place, the love and dream is there. Like so many things in this world, now it comes down to money. It's kind of hard to build a house and purchase animals and tools without money. God is starting to move and it is so awesome to see it happen.
Our first week at the ranch property we did some preliminary demolition and got started on some of the construction work that needed done. It was our family, our friend Randy, Scott, E., and Gabi and his dad. We got quite a bit done. E and I worked on tearing out an old brick oven. That was difficult work. But it felt so good to get my hands dirty and get some physical labor in. Unlike the week in Iabalcea where I kind of felt in the way, at the ranch I felt like I made a difference.
The 2nd week a large group from St. Louis came to join in our work. I think the single most detrimental stumbling block for a mission trip is poor communication. Without going into detail (because it doesn't really matter), we knew nothing about the St. Louis team that was coming out. All we knew was that it was huge (40+ people). They turned out to be such a huge blessing! They were able to work with several missionaries that are friends with Scott & Carolyn and so were a blessing on many fronts.
One of the biggest blessings that came out of it for Scott & Carolyn was that a couple of the people on the St. Louis team were able to come out to the ranch and film an interview with Scott, Carolyn & E. about Rock of Hope Ministries and the vision for the Ranch. They are then taking the film back to the States to help raise awareness and support for the ranch. That is HUGE! It was confirmation to us as well as Scott & Carolyn that God has this. It has been a long process, but God is putting things in place to make it happen. Without God, none of the dream for the ranch would be possible.
Keith and I also made some friends that are eager to return to Romania. That is also a blessing. The more people we can introduce to the Pouncey's and help them to catch their vision, the more the vision can spread and gain support.
I have a lot I could talk about, but so much of it involves the girls that live with the Pouncey's. I don't feel right sharing any of their stories because, as I've said before, they are not my stories to tell. However, I can say this. I feel connected to these girls. We are thousands of miles apart, but I still think and pray for them often. I still keep in touch with them. Though, lately, life seems to have become time consuming so I have not been able to talk to them for a while. I hope to remedy that this week.
So, the big question, for us at least, is do we want to go back. The answer is yes. I don't know how soon we will be able to simply because it is not cheap to fly a whole family to Europe for a month. However, it is totally worth every dime. The girls have become part of our family and we want to keep up those relationships as best we can. We still have friends from our first trip we would like to see again. And of course, we want to visit Scott, Carolyn, Gabi and Samina as well. I wish I could clone myself so I could just live in both countries at once. But, since that's never going to happen, I guess I just have to get better about finding time to Skype with the girls and save my pennies so someday soon we can return to our Romanian family.
Thursday, September 25, 2014
Thoughts on Romania - Part 5 - The Message to the Church in Gataia
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| Opera Square, Timisoara, Romania |
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| Orthodox Church in Opera Square |
On Sunday we were blessed to be able to visit our friends in Gataia for a short while. I wish we could have stayed with them longer. Especially since we haven't seen them in 2 years. But, it's just the way things worked out. We attended church in the morning and I had the honor of sharing a message with them. Afterward we got to eat at our favorite cook's house (Thank you Ramona! It is always a treat to visit you!!!) Today I found these videos on Youtube. I think the fact they even exist is odd, but if you want to see what the Romanian countryside (in fall/winter) and the towns look like, here is one way to see it I guess. Here you are able to see a drive through the countryside and some villages. At the 10min12sec mark you'll see Tabor Church on the right hand side. That is where we helped with VBS in 2012 and where we attended church. And here is a drive through Timisoara.
The main reason for my post today was to share the message I shared with our church family in Gataia. So, if you're not interested, I won't be offended if you stop reading now. But here it is...
"Let me start off by saying that I am not a pastor and I am not trained in preaching. All I can share with you is what God has placed on my heart. As I was thinking about what to share with you today, a line from one of my favorite praise songs repeated in my head. It goes like this: 'They will know we are Christians by our love.' This is taken from 1 John 3:10 which says, 'This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are: Anyone who does not do what is right is not a child of God; nor is anyone who does not love his brother.' It is our love for one another that is a testimony of our faith in Christ.
"Brennan Manning, and American author, said that, 'the single greatest cause of atheism in the world today is Christians who acknowledge Jesus with their lips then walk out the door and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable. If this is true, then we are not following what the Apostle John wrote in 1 John 3:18, 'Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth.'
"To be a Christian means to be like Christ. How did Christ love? Did he conform to the traditions of his day? No! His way of showing God's love to others was unique. For example, in Jesus' time, Samaritans were seen as unworthy of God's love, and as people to be avoided. I've seen racism like this in American against African Americans and Mexican Americans. I've also seen racism here in Romania against Gypsies. But when Jesus told his followers to love their neighbors as themselves, he gave them the parable of the Good Samaritan.
"The parable is found in Luke 10:25-37. In the story a man, most likely a Jew, was robbed, beaten and left half dead on the side of the road. His own religious leaders, a priest and a Levite saw him and purposefully avoided him. But a Samaritan took him and cared for him. Jesus used this parable to demonstrate that we are not to love only those like us, but that we are to love and respect others without discrimination.
"Jesus' love was also unique because he loved with grace and mercy. In John 8 we read about the grace and mercy Jesus gave to an adulterous woman. We can all agree that she had sinned. After challenging the Pharisees and the teachers of the law saying, 'If any of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her,' Jesus did something new. instead of giving her the punishment she deserved, he gave her grace. And he gave her mercy by giving her forgiveness she did not earn. If we are to be like Christ, we should also freely give people grace and mercy.
"Jesus' love is unique because he loved his enemies. He knew, before he ever carried his cross, who would be demanding his death upon it. But that did not stop him from preaching the Good News to them. Even when he was dying on the cross, Jesus was asking God to forgive them!
"Jesus was very clear about how we are to treat our enemies. He commanded us to love them unconditionally. Hear what He had to say in Luke 6:27-36.
27 “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. 29 If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. 30 Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. 31 Do to others as you would have them do to you.
32 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. 34 And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. 35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.
"By being like Christ, by loving the way Jesus loved, we are teaching others about Him. If we only speak of love, grace, mercy and forgiveness, but do no show it in our lives, we are no better than the Pharisees. And what did Jesus call them? Hypocrites and a brood of vipers! I am sure we can all agree that we do not want Jesus to think of us in such a way!
"Godly love, as demonstrated to us through his son Jesus, can change the world. But it starts with our families. Sometimes our families can be the hardest people to love. But if we love them the way Christ loves us, then they may gain salvation through that love.
"Most importantly we need to teach our children how to be like Christ. Proverbs 22:6 says, 'Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.' Our children will be the future leaders of our churches and our country. They are our most precious resource; priceless treasures given to us by God. If we want them to be successful we must teach them now to love and obey God.
"However, this is not the responsibility of just parents. A church with a strong youth program will see rewards for the growth of the church in years to come. I don't mean just this church, Because the church is not confined within these walls. It is made up of all believers, all over the world.
"One of my fondest memories is our time spent here in the summer of 2012. A team from our church came to help with VBS. I was amazed at the leadership I saw in the youth leaders. I could tell someone had spent time with them helping them to build relationships with one another. It was also obvious that someone had spent time training them how to teach the younger children. It was encouraging to see the potential these teenagers had for being leaders in the church.
"We must not wait until our children are grown to teach them about Jesus. Seventy-five to eighty-five percent of Christians accepted Christ as their savior before their 18th birthday. If we wait to lead kids to Christ we risk losing their souls for eternity. That is why things like VBS, a weekly kids club, Sunday school and camp are so important. These are not just times of enjoyment. It is these activities that reinforce the lessons they are learning at home.
"And for those kids that do not have a good home life, these ministries provide hope. If kids from Gataia know that they have a place that will accept them, they will come back. And when their parents see the changes in them, they may come to church to see what is so special about this place. So by reaching out to the kids in your community, you have the potential to bring whole families into the salvation we have through Jesus Christ.
"We live in a sinful world. But, by living and loving like Christ, we can be the light of life to the broken and hurting people around us. My prayer for you is this: Let every word spoken from your lips and every action of your body be motivated by the love of Christ.
"In closing, I leave you with the words of the Apostle Paul as found in Romans 19: 9-21.
9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. 10 Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. 11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13 Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position.[a] Do not be conceited.
17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:
“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”
21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Monday, September 22, 2014
Thoughts on Romania - Part 4 - Iabalcea
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| Wildflower in Iabalcea |
That was pretty much how I felt the first full week we were in Romania. After having a few days with the Pouncey's and their girls, we traveled with our friend Iosif and his wife Lanuta to a small village in the mountains. Every year Iosif puts together a week-long camp for kids from an orphanage. They play games, have puppet shows, go on hikes, sing songs, and most importantly hear the gospel. Iosif is incredibly good at what he does.
The name of the village is Iabalcea and it has a population of a few hundred people. A water tower was recently installed in the village so they now have running water. Up until a year or so ago they were still getting water in buckets from their wells. Outhouses are the norm. In fact, I'm not sure if there are any indoor bathrooms at all in the village. There were several stray dogs that roamed the gravel roads that ran through town. There is one school building. I can't remember for sure, but it either went to 4th or 8th grade. Either way, to continue education beyond that the kids would have to travel to the nearest town with a high school. There was one general store (called a magazine) that we made sure to visit everyday to get ice cream. Iabalcea is representative of most villages in Romania. |
| Walking through Iabalcea |
We decided to join Iosif and Lanuta at camp to help them with whatever they needed, but more so because we thought it would be a good experience for Jaedon and Emma. I had to keep reminding myself of that throughout the week because I felt like there was little I could do.
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| View of camp looking down from the top of the hill. |
Sixteen kids came to camp (plus our two and Iosif's grandson). In addition to the kids, Iosif's brother Adi (so sorry, but I never learned how to spell his name so I'm guessing), his mom (Mommi), 2 helpers from the children's home, Edith and Lydia, and Pastor John and his wife Ligia joined us at camp. Of all those people, Iosif, Adi, Edith and one of the kids spoke English. (John & Ligia spoke a little bit, but were not fluent). In a weird way, I think it was easiest and hardest on Emma. Easiest because you stick her in a room with 17 people who speak 17 languages and she'll come out with 17 friends, and hardest because she felt like an outsider - even though all the kids liked her and played with her. She got to the point where instead of trying to take part in the lesson times she'd help me with dishes. Jaedon struggled a little bit with fitting in with the boys. There were only five boys at camp, but they were all more physical than Jaedon is used to.
Since I speak very little Romania I couldn't do any of the teaching or talking with the kids to get to know them. But, we did play games with them every afternoon and we went on all the hikes with them. At first. Mommi wouldn't let me help with dishes. Not because she didn't think I could do it, but more because I think she looked to us as being guests. But, I managed to keep sneaking in to dishwasher duty and eventually she just smiled and let me do it. I think she understood my need to feel like I was earning my keep.I loved our time in Iabalcea, but it took me a while to be okay being an observer rather than a doer.
I loved watching our kids interact with the other children. (By the end of the week Emma even had 2 boys that liked her... oh my... teenage years are going to be tough!) I had a lot of really good conversations with Iosif. He works so hard for these kids! God is using him, there is no doubt about it. I enjoyed getting to know Edith and introducing her to things she'd only ever seen in the movies like American football, rock skipping and S'mores. I loved going on the long hikes and seeing snails big enough to eat (though I don't think I'd ever want to try). I loved seeing Mommi become a grandma to Jae & Em. She "spoiled" Emma with extra cups of sweet tea whenever she wanted it. I loved our walks to Nikka's magazine to get ice cream and pop. I fell in love with the countryside of Romania. By about midweek Jaedon asked, "Can we come here every year?"
In the end, yes it was worth it to spend our money to be observers to Iosif's ministry. It didn't matter if I didn't do any "work" at all. It mattered that my kids now have a love for the simpler things in life and that our friendship with Iosif and Lanuta has been strengthened.Wednesday, September 10, 2014
Thoughts on Romania - Part 3
I'm not sure I could do the work Scott & Carolyn Pouncey do. Its not that its physically hard, but it is emotionally, mentally, and spiritually draining. I admire them.
It was interesting listening to Scott tell about how they ended up in Romania in the first place. It all started because they wanted to give their daughters (who were teenagers at the time) a world view. They started exploring options of where they could go on a mission trip. Romania, for various reasons, is the place that worked out. Fast forward a couple of years and they started visiting on a yearly basis, working with Iosif (more about him later) at the camps he ran for orphans. They both felt that God was telling them to pursue mission work in Romania. So, together, they decided to pursue their options until doors closed. All the while they're thinking, "At some point the door is going to close." ...But it never did. In 2012 they welcomed the first girl into their home.
Scott & Carolyn work with girls who have aged out of the orphanage or who have come from abusive situations. They intentionally only accept a few girls into their home because they want it to feel like a family environment instead of just another institution. They help the girls learn what it is like to be part of a family, something that they either never experienced or only experienced for a short time. They also help them find jobs or finish their education. In a nutshell, they become Mom and Dad to their girls. Thus the emotional, mental, and spiritual exhaustion they face.
To protect the girls' privacy I will not give their names. I will just refer to them by the first letter of their name. I also will not tell much of their backgrounds, because their stories are not mine to tell.
There were 4 girls staying with the Pouncey's. R was the first girl that came to live with them. We met her when we were there in 2012. I don't know why, but she really likes Keith. We were really excited to get to see her again and to introduce her to our kids. She is so quiet and usually doesn't like to be in group settings. So, Keith made sure to spend time with her wherever she was at so she didn't feel like she had to be in the group to get face time with him. Sometimes, he would just stay up late with her watching a movie while I was entertaining our kids with the other girls.
The other three girls have been with them anywhere from 18 months to 10 months. Right away Emma hit it off with A. A is so sweet and so good with the kids! She took them to the park and to get ice cream. She has a little dog named Snoopy. (the Pouncey's have a dog named Chili Bean who is Snoopy's daughter). The dogs loved playing with Emma and A would use the dogs to teach Emma Romanian. Within two days Emma was giving the dogs commands: "come," "stay," "open," "shut," "leave it," "fetch." Even now, when we talk to A via Skype, she asks Emma to say her Romanian words so she doesn't forget them. A wants to go to school to be a teacher. She will be so good at it! A, if you're reading this, I want you to know that I have faith in you. You can do anything through God who gives you strength and I believe that he has given you a heart for kids. You will make a wonderful teacher. Don't give up!
E has been there about 18 months. At first, I don't think she was sure what to think of Keith. It's interesting to me how he can have such different relationships with each of the girls. With R, he is the older brother watching out for her, taking care of her. We didn't get enough time with A so I'm not sure how I'd categorize their relationship. With B, he's just the weird guy who is fun to hang out with. But with E, he was the pest, but in a loving way. He'd pick on her and give her a hard time. At first I really was worried that she would want nothing to do with him. But by the end of the trip they were mutually obnoxious (but in a sweet way) to each other.
B was pretty quiet around us. I think mostly it is because she does not speak much English even though she can understand quite a bit. When she wasn't working, she and Emma hung out. A lot of times it was spent just playing on each other's tablets or playing with the dogs. B laughs a lot and has a beautiful smile. She also sang in the church choir, so when we attended we had fun waving to her from the audience.
The first few days there were just rest days, but it gave us a lot of free time to spend with the girls. We even got to celebrate the 4th of July with them. That night we had a cook out with some missionary friends of Scott & Carolyn. It was so much fun! Believe it or not, we celebrated with people from New Zealand, Romania, Scotland and Britain! Best 4th of July ever!!! We even had fireworks which was pretty cool. As we sat around the campfire we took time to pray over each country that was represented there. I've celebrated the 4th of July ever since I was a kid, but this was the first time I think I truly understood what freedom is all about. We are blessed to live in America. I think over the years I've fallen victim to the "grass is greener on the other side" syndrome, but we have it REALLY good here. Even our worst is better than some countries' best. We need to remember that and be thankful! Being grateful does not mean that we settle for less than we are able to achieve as a country. But it does mean we need to recognize what we do have and stop complaining about what we don't, because our "don'ts" usually are pretty selfish things anyway.
It was interesting listening to Scott tell about how they ended up in Romania in the first place. It all started because they wanted to give their daughters (who were teenagers at the time) a world view. They started exploring options of where they could go on a mission trip. Romania, for various reasons, is the place that worked out. Fast forward a couple of years and they started visiting on a yearly basis, working with Iosif (more about him later) at the camps he ran for orphans. They both felt that God was telling them to pursue mission work in Romania. So, together, they decided to pursue their options until doors closed. All the while they're thinking, "At some point the door is going to close." ...But it never did. In 2012 they welcomed the first girl into their home.
Scott & Carolyn work with girls who have aged out of the orphanage or who have come from abusive situations. They intentionally only accept a few girls into their home because they want it to feel like a family environment instead of just another institution. They help the girls learn what it is like to be part of a family, something that they either never experienced or only experienced for a short time. They also help them find jobs or finish their education. In a nutshell, they become Mom and Dad to their girls. Thus the emotional, mental, and spiritual exhaustion they face.
To protect the girls' privacy I will not give their names. I will just refer to them by the first letter of their name. I also will not tell much of their backgrounds, because their stories are not mine to tell.
There were 4 girls staying with the Pouncey's. R was the first girl that came to live with them. We met her when we were there in 2012. I don't know why, but she really likes Keith. We were really excited to get to see her again and to introduce her to our kids. She is so quiet and usually doesn't like to be in group settings. So, Keith made sure to spend time with her wherever she was at so she didn't feel like she had to be in the group to get face time with him. Sometimes, he would just stay up late with her watching a movie while I was entertaining our kids with the other girls.
The other three girls have been with them anywhere from 18 months to 10 months. Right away Emma hit it off with A. A is so sweet and so good with the kids! She took them to the park and to get ice cream. She has a little dog named Snoopy. (the Pouncey's have a dog named Chili Bean who is Snoopy's daughter). The dogs loved playing with Emma and A would use the dogs to teach Emma Romanian. Within two days Emma was giving the dogs commands: "come," "stay," "open," "shut," "leave it," "fetch." Even now, when we talk to A via Skype, she asks Emma to say her Romanian words so she doesn't forget them. A wants to go to school to be a teacher. She will be so good at it! A, if you're reading this, I want you to know that I have faith in you. You can do anything through God who gives you strength and I believe that he has given you a heart for kids. You will make a wonderful teacher. Don't give up!
E has been there about 18 months. At first, I don't think she was sure what to think of Keith. It's interesting to me how he can have such different relationships with each of the girls. With R, he is the older brother watching out for her, taking care of her. We didn't get enough time with A so I'm not sure how I'd categorize their relationship. With B, he's just the weird guy who is fun to hang out with. But with E, he was the pest, but in a loving way. He'd pick on her and give her a hard time. At first I really was worried that she would want nothing to do with him. But by the end of the trip they were mutually obnoxious (but in a sweet way) to each other.
B was pretty quiet around us. I think mostly it is because she does not speak much English even though she can understand quite a bit. When she wasn't working, she and Emma hung out. A lot of times it was spent just playing on each other's tablets or playing with the dogs. B laughs a lot and has a beautiful smile. She also sang in the church choir, so when we attended we had fun waving to her from the audience.
The first few days there were just rest days, but it gave us a lot of free time to spend with the girls. We even got to celebrate the 4th of July with them. That night we had a cook out with some missionary friends of Scott & Carolyn. It was so much fun! Believe it or not, we celebrated with people from New Zealand, Romania, Scotland and Britain! Best 4th of July ever!!! We even had fireworks which was pretty cool. As we sat around the campfire we took time to pray over each country that was represented there. I've celebrated the 4th of July ever since I was a kid, but this was the first time I think I truly understood what freedom is all about. We are blessed to live in America. I think over the years I've fallen victim to the "grass is greener on the other side" syndrome, but we have it REALLY good here. Even our worst is better than some countries' best. We need to remember that and be thankful! Being grateful does not mean that we settle for less than we are able to achieve as a country. But it does mean we need to recognize what we do have and stop complaining about what we don't, because our "don'ts" usually are pretty selfish things anyway.
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Thoughts on Romania Part 2
When Keith first mentioned the idea of spending a month in Romania my first instinct was to say, "No way!" I am not really the adventurous type. I like to stay in my comfortable environment with all factors known to me. The unknown stresses me out.
We had talked about going to Japan for some missions work (did you know that many people displaced by the earthquake and tsunami in 2011 are still living in temporary housing?). At the same time, we were in talks with Scott & Carolyn Pouncey of Rock of Hope Ministries in Romania about some help they needed. The Japan trip was up in the air while the Romania trip had more solid needs and specific dates that we could plan around. After praying as a family (the kids were totally involved in the decision as well) Romania is where we decided to go.
I'm grateful to Keith, because without him we probably wouldn't have gone anywhere. He got the idea in his head (planted by God???) that it was time to go somewhere, so he took the initiative to ask around about opportunities in Japan and to ask Scott if he needed help. If it had been left up to me, I would have waited to hear about a trip already planned and then decided to join it. But that is not how Keith works. He doesn't wait for things to fall into his lap. If he feels called or nudged or whatever you want to label it, he acts. I love that about him.
But he wanted to stay a month! That's a long time to be in a foreign country. That's a long time to be out of your comfort zone. That's a long time to be in an apartment 24/7 with two kids in tow... no matter how much I adore and love them! This girl likes her personal space... and quiet. Did I mention I like quiet?
But, was there any reason not to go for that length of time? Keith works from home. So as long as he has internet he can work from pretty much any where in the world. He also had a lot of overtime this past year which provided financially for the trip. The kids would be out of school and I would be too. We had a friend that agreed to house-sit for us. There was no reason not to go for a month.
So, in early January we started planning our trip. I took care of getting the kids passports. Keith took care of booking plane tickets. Before I knew it, the months flew by and we were on a plane to Romania. Best... decision... ever.
Our first few days were spent acclimating to the time change. And remember that quiet that I like so much? Well, while we were staying in the city where Scott & Carolyn live there was not much of it. And breaks from my kids? Well, I think I had maybe one afternoon without them around. But no personal space didn't seem to be such a big deal to me there.
The reasons I had for staying home, in my comfort zone, were stupid and selfish and based on fear. The reasons for going (and for why we'll go back) are based on love, friendship and hope. Part of my heart is still in Romania. It's been there since our frist trip in 2012. I feel like it is becoming my second home. I don't know what that means for our future, whether we'll spend a month there every couple of years, or if we'll spend every summer there. I don't feel that God is calling us to move there permanently. But, I've learned a long time ago to never assume that the place I'm at now is where God is calling me to stay. So, who knows? Maybe in a few years we'll be planning our trip to come back to the States for a month before returning home to Romania. I have no idea. The future is not mapped out for us. And, by the grace of God, I am OK with that (just don't tell my mom... it might freak her out!) :)
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| July 1, 2014 - At the airport ready to go to Romania. |
Thursday, August 28, 2014
Thoughts on Romania Part 1
I have been struggling to get excited about writing my thoughts about our recent Romania trip. It's not because we didn't do fun stuff or that I don't have thoughts to share. I've just really struggled with seeing this last trip as a mission trip. I guess I've always assumed that missions work should involve some type of sacrifice or feel like a sacrifice. I don't know if its because we took a week at the end of it for a family vacation in Germany or because the work seemed too "easy." But this trip, unlike when we went 2 years ago, did not seem like a sacrifice to me. Maybe I've just learned that I'm home wherever my family is, no matter the circumstances. It felt like our only sacrifice was money, and even that didn't feel like a sacrifice, but a blessing that God has been providing to us for the past year (yay for overtime pay!).
Each trip I take affects me in a different way. My Haiti trip in 2010 was life changing. I truly feel that God used that experience as a spring board to get me and my family moving towards missions work. I can honestly say those 9 days in Haiti were the most intense, heart-breaking, scary, exciting, & emotional days in my life. I'd say it was probably the most "spiritually high" (there's a good church phrase for you) that I've ever been. I feel like every trip since then has been trying to recapture those moments of clarity when I felt God's presence so close and tangible. That's not to say that I haven't felt God's presence on other trips, it's just... different.
Romania in 2012 was just Keith and me with four other people. That was hard because we left the kids at home. That trip was also an answer to prayer for me because it was our first trip together overseas. We have done mission work together in the states, but being out of your comfort zone is a whole different experience and it was one I wanted to share with Keith. It was also the first time I felt compelled to return to a place (in the states or abroad) where I've served. I know it sounds weird when I say how much I loved my trip to Haiti and how life-changing it was, but I can honestly say, I do not have a desire to return. But Romania... I can see myself returning there yearly, Lord willing.
As I ponder these past trips I'm starting to realize maybe that is why this one did not feel like a sacrifice. Maybe when you are in the mission field that God has called you to (whether it is working with handicap kids, traveling to foreign countries, working in a soup kitchen or being a stay-at-home mom), the sacrifice seems minimal because your heart is in line with what God called you to do. And really, isn't that what we're all looking for? To feel like we are walking with God rather than trying to figure out where God is? Isn't that where true peace lies? Until next time...
"And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 4:7)
Friday, August 1, 2014
And God remembered...
I'm not promising that this post will make sense. We just returned from a month-long stay in Europe. I have been back in my own house just barley more than 12 hours. I'm tired, slightly cranky and feel a bit overwhelmed with the catching up I need to do. However, the same thought keeps rolling around in my head: "God remembered...."
When Noah was floating on the rolling seas, "God remembered Noah and all the wild animals and the livestock that were with him in the ark, and he sent a wind over the earth, and the waters receded" (Genesis 8:1). At the destruction of Sodom & Gomorrah, "when God destroyed the cities of the plain, he remembered Abraham, and he brought Lot out of the catastrophe that overthrew the cities where Lot had lived." (Gen. 19:29) When Rachel was barren and unable to have a child, "God remembered Rachel; he listened to her and enabled her to conceive." (Gen. 30:22) When God's people, the Israelites, were enslaved in Egypt, "God heard their groaning and he remembered his covenant with Abraham, with Isaac and with Jacob." (Ex. 2:24).
What does this have to do with my being jet-lagged? Well, this is the same phrase that was rolling around in my head for most of the last month. Our family was very blessed to be able to spend about 3 1/2 weeks in Romania on a mission trip. (We took the last week of the month to have some family time in Germany). We returned to an area that Keith and I had visited 2 years previously. As we met up with old friends I kept thinking, "God remembered..."
Knowing you're not forgotten gives hope. Knowing you're remembered breaths life into a lifeless soul. Being remembered can be life changing.
I'll try to be concise as I give a run down of those we remember.
Iosif: He is a Romanian that we met during our last visit. He used to smuggle Bibles into Romania while it was still in communist hands. His passion is for reaching out to children with God's love. He runs camps, VBS, kids' club, anything he can to reach out to children and give them the hope that comes only through Christ. One of our last nights with him, we had just returned from a week-long camp in the mountains. We were all tired. Somehow, his wife, Lanuta (pronounced Lahnootza) still managed to make us dinner before she went to bed. She apologized for being tired. I think she felt like she wasn't being a good hostess. We would have gladly walked to a market to pick up bread and meat. We didn't want her to feel put out. We weren't special guests who had come to visit, we had come to work alongside them. We told Iosif something along those lines. In return he said, "No, you're friends." That simple title, "friends" struck me. Because we had remembered him and Lanuta and come back to work alongside them, we had moved beyond the acquaintances we were after the last trip and became friends.
Our "family" in Gataia (Denissa, Denisa, Marius, Mada, Christi, Ligia, Mariana, Marcel, Elvira, Ramona, Florian, Andra to name a few). Last visit we spent a week in Gataia helping Iosif run VBS. We made connections with several of the youth leaders there and have been able to keep up with them via Facebook. We wanted to visit them if we could. We were able to attend church there one Sunday. Even those we have not been able to keep up with on Facebook, we were able to see face to face for the first time in 2 years. There were tears of joy and lots of hugs shared. Our time with them was short (too short), but we were able to reaffirm what we had said the last time we were there. In response to being asked why we had returned to Romania I said something like this: "Last time we were here, I told some of the teenagers that I felt like I was leaving part of my heart in Romania. You have become family to us. That is why we have returned."
Scott & Carolyn: They have been serving as missionaries in Romania for 8 (?) years. That is a long time to be away from friends and family. By returning it gave them encouragement, letting them know they are not forgotten by those still in the States.
R: I won't post her full name to protect her privacy, but she knows who she is. There is nothing she needs to hide from, but she is extremely introverted and I don't know if she would like a bunch of strangers reading about her. We met her last time we stayed with Scott & Carolyn and there was an instant connection between her and Keith. Towards the end of our stay this time she told Carolyn that she felt like we were her parents and Jaedon & Emma were her siblings.
Gabbi & Samina: We met them briefly last time. They are partners with Scott & Carolyn in their ministry. Keith said several times that if Gabbi lived in the States he was sure they would be really good friends. Good thing you don't have to live in the same country to be friends!
And there were others - Bogdan, Jackie, Levu (sorry - I probably spelled your name wrong), the kids in Dud (pronounced Dude), and the church in Vinga (that we didn't get to visit this time). We remembered them all. As we met with each one of these people I kept thinking, "God remembered," and it was like God was letting me know that I need to keep these connections strong. I need to let these people know that I will not forget them.
And then God did something special for me. The last week we were in Romania I spent a day in Dud helping out with a VBS. Well, I didn't actually do anything... which really bothered me at first. Without going into details, we weren't sure how VBS would turn out because we didn't have a lot of information going into it. But, it turned out great. The team from St. Louis had a plan. Between them and Bogdan everything was covered so I was not needed. (I was kind of there to fill in the gaps since I had done it before and knew from experience what needed to be done and how the schedule typically works). But, I wasn't needed so I just sat back and watched. Then something pretty cool happened. One of the kids that had been there 2 years ago said, "Ceau Naomi!" He said my name! He remembered me! Even in a moment when I felt unneeded and slightly in the way, God let me know that I was remembered.
I don't think God ever forgets his people. It's not like he went, "Oh, whoops! Noah is still on that boat. I better take care of that!" Just like all those I've met in Romania have a place in my heart, we all have a place in God's. It's just that sometimes those face to face visits can't happen as much as we would like. Just because we don't have those face to face times with God does not mean we aren't important to Him. Maybe it's just that someone needs Him more in that moment than we do. But He still remembers us.
And now, my list of Romanian friends and family has grown much longer. My heart is getting bigger simply because there are so many more people that are being held there. I think that is what this whole trip was about. It wasn't about camp, or doing construction work on the ranch. It was about remembering those God has placed in my life and being remembered in return.
When Noah was floating on the rolling seas, "God remembered Noah and all the wild animals and the livestock that were with him in the ark, and he sent a wind over the earth, and the waters receded" (Genesis 8:1). At the destruction of Sodom & Gomorrah, "when God destroyed the cities of the plain, he remembered Abraham, and he brought Lot out of the catastrophe that overthrew the cities where Lot had lived." (Gen. 19:29) When Rachel was barren and unable to have a child, "God remembered Rachel; he listened to her and enabled her to conceive." (Gen. 30:22) When God's people, the Israelites, were enslaved in Egypt, "God heard their groaning and he remembered his covenant with Abraham, with Isaac and with Jacob." (Ex. 2:24).
What does this have to do with my being jet-lagged? Well, this is the same phrase that was rolling around in my head for most of the last month. Our family was very blessed to be able to spend about 3 1/2 weeks in Romania on a mission trip. (We took the last week of the month to have some family time in Germany). We returned to an area that Keith and I had visited 2 years previously. As we met up with old friends I kept thinking, "God remembered..."
Knowing you're not forgotten gives hope. Knowing you're remembered breaths life into a lifeless soul. Being remembered can be life changing.
I'll try to be concise as I give a run down of those we remember.
Iosif: He is a Romanian that we met during our last visit. He used to smuggle Bibles into Romania while it was still in communist hands. His passion is for reaching out to children with God's love. He runs camps, VBS, kids' club, anything he can to reach out to children and give them the hope that comes only through Christ. One of our last nights with him, we had just returned from a week-long camp in the mountains. We were all tired. Somehow, his wife, Lanuta (pronounced Lahnootza) still managed to make us dinner before she went to bed. She apologized for being tired. I think she felt like she wasn't being a good hostess. We would have gladly walked to a market to pick up bread and meat. We didn't want her to feel put out. We weren't special guests who had come to visit, we had come to work alongside them. We told Iosif something along those lines. In return he said, "No, you're friends." That simple title, "friends" struck me. Because we had remembered him and Lanuta and come back to work alongside them, we had moved beyond the acquaintances we were after the last trip and became friends.
Our "family" in Gataia (Denissa, Denisa, Marius, Mada, Christi, Ligia, Mariana, Marcel, Elvira, Ramona, Florian, Andra to name a few). Last visit we spent a week in Gataia helping Iosif run VBS. We made connections with several of the youth leaders there and have been able to keep up with them via Facebook. We wanted to visit them if we could. We were able to attend church there one Sunday. Even those we have not been able to keep up with on Facebook, we were able to see face to face for the first time in 2 years. There were tears of joy and lots of hugs shared. Our time with them was short (too short), but we were able to reaffirm what we had said the last time we were there. In response to being asked why we had returned to Romania I said something like this: "Last time we were here, I told some of the teenagers that I felt like I was leaving part of my heart in Romania. You have become family to us. That is why we have returned."
Scott & Carolyn: They have been serving as missionaries in Romania for 8 (?) years. That is a long time to be away from friends and family. By returning it gave them encouragement, letting them know they are not forgotten by those still in the States.
R: I won't post her full name to protect her privacy, but she knows who she is. There is nothing she needs to hide from, but she is extremely introverted and I don't know if she would like a bunch of strangers reading about her. We met her last time we stayed with Scott & Carolyn and there was an instant connection between her and Keith. Towards the end of our stay this time she told Carolyn that she felt like we were her parents and Jaedon & Emma were her siblings.
Gabbi & Samina: We met them briefly last time. They are partners with Scott & Carolyn in their ministry. Keith said several times that if Gabbi lived in the States he was sure they would be really good friends. Good thing you don't have to live in the same country to be friends!
And there were others - Bogdan, Jackie, Levu (sorry - I probably spelled your name wrong), the kids in Dud (pronounced Dude), and the church in Vinga (that we didn't get to visit this time). We remembered them all. As we met with each one of these people I kept thinking, "God remembered," and it was like God was letting me know that I need to keep these connections strong. I need to let these people know that I will not forget them.
And then God did something special for me. The last week we were in Romania I spent a day in Dud helping out with a VBS. Well, I didn't actually do anything... which really bothered me at first. Without going into details, we weren't sure how VBS would turn out because we didn't have a lot of information going into it. But, it turned out great. The team from St. Louis had a plan. Between them and Bogdan everything was covered so I was not needed. (I was kind of there to fill in the gaps since I had done it before and knew from experience what needed to be done and how the schedule typically works). But, I wasn't needed so I just sat back and watched. Then something pretty cool happened. One of the kids that had been there 2 years ago said, "Ceau Naomi!" He said my name! He remembered me! Even in a moment when I felt unneeded and slightly in the way, God let me know that I was remembered.
I don't think God ever forgets his people. It's not like he went, "Oh, whoops! Noah is still on that boat. I better take care of that!" Just like all those I've met in Romania have a place in my heart, we all have a place in God's. It's just that sometimes those face to face visits can't happen as much as we would like. Just because we don't have those face to face times with God does not mean we aren't important to Him. Maybe it's just that someone needs Him more in that moment than we do. But He still remembers us.
And now, my list of Romanian friends and family has grown much longer. My heart is getting bigger simply because there are so many more people that are being held there. I think that is what this whole trip was about. It wasn't about camp, or doing construction work on the ranch. It was about remembering those God has placed in my life and being remembered in return.
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